Dancing Pillsbury Doughboy
http://www.pillsbury.com/AaLL/dancingdoughboy.aspx?WT.mc_id=FRD&p=Mu7LD6kgYj4gqVVhO8vnHg==
Monday, March 19, 2007
50 Fun Things to Do at Wal-Mart
*BONUS*
1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten-minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift-wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk really slowly, especially in thin aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.
11. Turn all the radios to polka stations; then turn them off and turn the volume up to full blast.
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi. I haven't seen you in so long." etc. See if they play along.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, "Who buys this junk anyway?!"
15. Repeat #14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you aretaking it for a test drive.
17. Follow people through the aisles, staying about 5 feet behind them. Do this until they leave the store.
18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchase over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, "Wow, magic!"
20. Take off your shoes and tell them you want to return it and when they say you didn't buy it there say "Hmmmm....I thought the customer was always right!"
21. Move "Caution : Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you will only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can catch from otheraisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying,"I'm Batman. Come Robin, to the Batcave."
26. Teepee as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell "hello"upside down.
29. When someone asks you if you need help, begin to cry and say, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"
30. When 2 or 3 people are walking ahead of you, run between them yelling "Red Rover."
31. Make up nonsense products and ask employees if there are any in stock. (i.e.: Shnerples)
32. Take up an entire aisle in toys by setting up a full-scale battle with G.I. Joe vs. X-men.
33. Take bets on the battle from above.
34. Test the brushes and combs in cosmetics.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic aspossible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission Impossible.
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
40. Say things like, "Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies."
41. Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: Marco Polo.
43. Leave Cheerios in lawn and garden, pillows in the pet section, etc.
44. "Re-alphabetize" the CD's.
45. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look with various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from his or her cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, drop to your knees and scream, "No, no, its those voices again."
49. Pay off layaways 50 cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair over to the magazines and relax. Go to the food court, buy a drink, and explain that you don't get out much and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
*BONUS*
Attempt to do all of the above in the same visit, without getting kicked out.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Missions Conference 2007
What an exciting conference! We heard from many different missionaries about their field work and deputation travels. It has been a very awesome time! I have been challenged in my own life about my willingness to serve as a missionary. Even as an M.K. (Missionary's kid, for those of you who don't know :-} ), I had to examine my own life and see if I really was willing to surrender to that kind of ministry. One mission field that has been brought to my attention several times within the past 6 months is that of Zambia, Africa. A missionary from my church, Eve a Douglas, is on deputation to go to Zambia as a full-time missionary. Her neice and I have been talking about going there for about a year, give or take, to help out with the ministry. Then another missionary came to the conference and presented his ministry in Zambia as well. Phil Hunt has been in Zambia since 1992. Some of his areas of ministry include Central African Baptist College and Faith Children's Village Orphanage. I was ready to jump on the plane and fly to Zambia after hearing and seeing the presentation. But I can't allow my emotions to get in the way of what's really there, and what I'm not seeing. I have to make sure that my decisions are based on God's will for my life. Whether or not God has me going to Zambia, I need to be willing to go anywhere that He might have me go, and also be a missionary where I'm at now.
That's another thing. Missions is not all about going overseas. It's about being a missionary to the people around you where you live. All God's children are missionaries. You don't have to go on deputation, to raise money, to travel all over the country in order to be a missionary. You can be a missionary at your workplace, at your school, in your grocery store, gas station, restaurant, the list goes on. People don't seem to get every aspect involved in missions. If we can only see what is going on around us, and take action in reaching out, we will be able to see the fruit of our labor, and also eventually see even more missionaries come out of the evangelism.
The Apostle Paul is one missionary that fascinates me, the one I consider my 'favorite' missionary. His life is reflective of what a true missionary should be. He suffered torment, near-death situations, imprisonment, rejection - he suffered it all! And yet, he did not give up and leave the ministry because things got tough. NO! He counted it a joy to suffer for Christ! But there came a time when he was ready to go Home. In Philippians, he said, "Yes, and I will rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death. For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith, so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again."
Paul had a desire to be with his Maker. What child of God wouldn't? Or rather, why do God's children not desire that? Paul was ready to go home, but he knew that his mission was not complete. He knew God had more work for him to do. Paul said, "it is better for you." In speaking to the Philippians, he was saying, "For your sake, I will continue on the ministry God gave me a burden for." Is it selfish to want to leave this world, even the ministry God gave him, to want to be gone from all this sin? I don't think so. Paul didn't view it that way. He put the needs of others in front of his own desires.
So I have to ask myself this question: Is "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain" my life's philosophy? Or is, "For me to live is gain, and to die is Christ"? I have to clearly evaluate my life, leaving no area out, and ask myself if I am truly willing to die for the cause of Christ. And is it such a desire in my heart to go Home that I get homesick? Or do I dread the thought of dying? I want to go to Heaven. No questions about that. But is it such a desire in my life that I can't desire anything other than being with my Savior?
I can't wish away my life, though. I need to consider the ministry that God has given me to do to further His Kingdom. I need to re-evaluate what I'm doing with my life and take into consideration what I need to do to reach out to people for Him. If I get too caught up in the materialistic part of life, then I allow the world's view of life and death to cloud God's view. I can't allow that.
I have so many things running through my head about this whole thing, that nothing may seem to make sense. Most likely this whole posting is a series of rabbit trails and ramblings. But I know what I mean, and I hope that it's a challenge to any that read this.
Prepare for Rain.
What an exciting conference! We heard from many different missionaries about their field work and deputation travels. It has been a very awesome time! I have been challenged in my own life about my willingness to serve as a missionary. Even as an M.K. (Missionary's kid, for those of you who don't know :-} ), I had to examine my own life and see if I really was willing to surrender to that kind of ministry. One mission field that has been brought to my attention several times within the past 6 months is that of Zambia, Africa. A missionary from my church, Eve a Douglas, is on deputation to go to Zambia as a full-time missionary. Her neice and I have been talking about going there for about a year, give or take, to help out with the ministry. Then another missionary came to the conference and presented his ministry in Zambia as well. Phil Hunt has been in Zambia since 1992. Some of his areas of ministry include Central African Baptist College and Faith Children's Village Orphanage. I was ready to jump on the plane and fly to Zambia after hearing and seeing the presentation. But I can't allow my emotions to get in the way of what's really there, and what I'm not seeing. I have to make sure that my decisions are based on God's will for my life. Whether or not God has me going to Zambia, I need to be willing to go anywhere that He might have me go, and also be a missionary where I'm at now.
That's another thing. Missions is not all about going overseas. It's about being a missionary to the people around you where you live. All God's children are missionaries. You don't have to go on deputation, to raise money, to travel all over the country in order to be a missionary. You can be a missionary at your workplace, at your school, in your grocery store, gas station, restaurant, the list goes on. People don't seem to get every aspect involved in missions. If we can only see what is going on around us, and take action in reaching out, we will be able to see the fruit of our labor, and also eventually see even more missionaries come out of the evangelism.
The Apostle Paul is one missionary that fascinates me, the one I consider my 'favorite' missionary. His life is reflective of what a true missionary should be. He suffered torment, near-death situations, imprisonment, rejection - he suffered it all! And yet, he did not give up and leave the ministry because things got tough. NO! He counted it a joy to suffer for Christ! But there came a time when he was ready to go Home. In Philippians, he said, "Yes, and I will rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance, as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death. For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith, so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again."
Paul had a desire to be with his Maker. What child of God wouldn't? Or rather, why do God's children not desire that? Paul was ready to go home, but he knew that his mission was not complete. He knew God had more work for him to do. Paul said, "it is better for you." In speaking to the Philippians, he was saying, "For your sake, I will continue on the ministry God gave me a burden for." Is it selfish to want to leave this world, even the ministry God gave him, to want to be gone from all this sin? I don't think so. Paul didn't view it that way. He put the needs of others in front of his own desires.
So I have to ask myself this question: Is "For me to live is Christ, and to die is gain" my life's philosophy? Or is, "For me to live is gain, and to die is Christ"? I have to clearly evaluate my life, leaving no area out, and ask myself if I am truly willing to die for the cause of Christ. And is it such a desire in my heart to go Home that I get homesick? Or do I dread the thought of dying? I want to go to Heaven. No questions about that. But is it such a desire in my life that I can't desire anything other than being with my Savior?
I can't wish away my life, though. I need to consider the ministry that God has given me to do to further His Kingdom. I need to re-evaluate what I'm doing with my life and take into consideration what I need to do to reach out to people for Him. If I get too caught up in the materialistic part of life, then I allow the world's view of life and death to cloud God's view. I can't allow that.
I have so many things running through my head about this whole thing, that nothing may seem to make sense. Most likely this whole posting is a series of rabbit trails and ramblings. But I know what I mean, and I hope that it's a challenge to any that read this.
Prepare for Rain.
Friday, March 02, 2007
Thursday, March 01, 2007
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